On Young, New Christians

The Christian Fellowship in my NS camp is approximately 15 people strong. At the beginning I was quite surprised to discover that quite a number of them were very new Christians. Some had only been converts for a few years, and there was even one who got converted just before entering camp.

As time wore on, however, I grew quite disappointed seeing their response toward the pastor's sermons as well as their lack of participation in terms of song leading and speaking up. Note that I am NOT used to being the most active member in any given fellowship. But as I felt that everyone else just wasn't really up to it (I'm sure even dNAers have come across such people in your own churches), I had no choice but to step forward more than I normally would have.

A rather charismatic pastor from a local Tamil church conducts our CF held every Thusday and Friday night. His sermons have been quite an extensive series on the subject of faith. The sermons in the church we worship in (yes, that traditional brethren one) are good, but I feel that they are not very new-believer friendly in that they tend to assume the congregation already know much background information (as sermons are always wont to do). Also quite a few of the CF members are Chinese-speaking, so they are often not able to catch and understand everything that the speaker is saying. After service is a special program for us NS trainees, which focuses on more practical aspects of being a Christian such as BGR and peer pressure.

Being from the family I come from, I place much emphasis on studying the Bible, and I felt that none of the 3 spiritual inputs my fellow CF members were getting weekly focused chiefly on the written Word. So I thought I'd talk to my CF pastor to see if he could spare me about half an hour to present a broad overview of the Bible and to introduce each book of the Bible in front of the class. He then told me that he'd tried Bible study before but found previous students bored and uninterested. But he was willing to let me have a try. That was on Thursday night, and as it turned out, he was not available to come and teach us on the very next day (Friday night) and was just wondering what he should do. I took it as a silent nod from God. He said I could gather the people and conduct the little 'talk' then, to which I agreed.

Friday night came, and I started off with a time of sharing. I asked if there was anyone who wanted to share and was taken aback when two offered to share their testimony. It was then that I realized that I had made a gross misconception. All this while it had failed to register that the fact that they were "new Christians" most probably meant they had recently gone through some rather dramatic events in their lives. All this while, what I took to be disinterest and passiveness on their part, was actually mere shyness and a general uncertainty and discomfort as to what was expected of them due to a lack of prolonged exposure to Christian circles - they are just as fired up for Him as I am, probably even more so. Indeed, who was I to expect to them to behave all "church youth"-like, which basically means someone who knows how to lead worship, knows how to say the right prayers at the right time and who speaks up in class, only if to give a nod or say "Amen" or "Hallelujah". After that my little 'talk' went on as expected (their response was rather neutral, which was also much to be expected, but I felt that I had done my job), and then we had more sharing.

Since then, I have been constantly thinking about what I could really do for them. As it happened, I found myself commissioned to distribute Asian Beacon (which is astonishingly heavy in bulk) among the CF. I hope that AB would be beneficial to them and that I would have truly helped them in some way. Still I hope that you all would pray with me for them, that they would truly grow deeper in God and come to know Him and His Word equally well.

Family

Disclaimer: this is not to ask for sympathy nor of to show how sad my story may be, and never any intent to shame my family, but to show how God has used us, regard us as if worthy of His love. And my mom- she is not that bad after all.

Ah, finally I sat in front it and started typing this out, after a long time seeing all the posts.

I came from a broken family. Broken, but not abandoned. My dad is a single parent, ever since 02. In 2002, many things have happened - my grandmother passed away, my dog was given away, my parents went through divorce, and then my dad embrace the love of Christ, and I was introduced to a church - a greater and bigger family.

It has been especially tough for my dad through the years. We still stay in the house we used to, my mom stayed not far away. Sometimes on the road, my dad would saw my mom. It has been heart-breaking. My dad has struggled for a long time, and now still, perhaps, to forgive the one he used to call wife. And every time, he saw my sis and I, he felt sorry, as if he could have done better. But dad, what you've done is really much appreciated, who you are is who we loved.

And my mom, as time goes by, the relationship between us become fragile, and we aren't that close any longer. I have not really understood what has happened between my dad and mom, my dad had tried to preserve as much as he could, a mom's image of her to us. It was heart-breaking to me, not because of the divorce, but what causes it. I've been trying to define what have caused it, but guess it's not important, I only no, it is what we called - something-not-of-love and something-not-of-God.

And during each milestone of my life, each birthday, each family time, each mother's day, each father's day, each Christmas, each Chinese New Year. I really cannot express how, or rather, how I slowly get used to it. I walked past restaurants, seeing the family together, having their meals together. I walked into people's homes, seeing how their moms passed them their angpows.

I walked into the church, and the speaker greeted all the moms a blessed mother's day while I wonder where is my mom. My sisters same in with other kids to pass all the moms in the congregation the gifts they have made, and I wonder what she felt. The speaker speaks of how important the relationship of the husbands and their wives, and I dared not take a look at my dad's face, only praying at my seat, "God, take care of my dad."

Many have asked, when they visited my house, where is my mom, and I said what I guess is the truth, and they said sorry, and I wondered why. To all friends who have asked, please don't feel bad, it's okay, really.

After all, if it was not because of what has happened in 02, I would not have known Christ. If not because of that, my dad still worship what he doesn't really know. If not because of that I would not been challenged to stand at a different view about what relationship and commitment is concerning boy-girl relationship when seeing my friends holding hands with their partners.

And if not God's love, my dad would have been lost. If not His church, my dad would have commited suicide. If not His church, my sis and I would be fatherless.

And when I looked back, despite many things I can complaint about, and argued with the One who loves us, and besides saying that what am I, a creature to talk to its Creator like that, I was pretty content of how He has loved me.

I've been a sinner, a dirty, filthy worm who has been involved in sexual fantasies and dirty thoughts. Sometime worse. But perhaps, just everything that you never know raymond has done. Yet, one day, I encountered Him and His love, and He taught me what forgiveness means, besides, how could I truly know my Savior if not know what exactly is called forgiveness and grace? He taught me how He actually carried all those dirty thoughts to the cross, bearing all the shame, as if He did what I did wrong.

And in my later years in secondary, while I was crazy over a girl, He saved me from a multitude of sins. If not Jesus, I would have been like any of those who was reported and condemned on newspaper and by public as pervert and wicked, unwise and worldly. I am prone to lustful thoughts. And it has been a real struggle in this young man's battle. And I know, I cannot fight this alone. In fact, I am not alone, and if only I relied on His strength and recognise His power is made perfect in my weaknesses. Yet, those days, if not those people, friends, brothers and sisters God placed in my life besides me, I would have gone into a relationship with her and perhaps did the most unimaginable thing.

Pretty much of this was because of what has happened in my family. Not implying that God has no other way to save us, but He knows what is best for us, He knows what is He doing. And we shall rest assured because our family, our future, our relationship, our studies, our career, our calling, our destiny, our lives, our family - His church are in the hands of He who loves us.

For the scripture says,

"No eye has seen,
no ears has heard,
no mind has conceived
what God has prepared for those who love Him"
-1 Corinthians 2:9

And truly I believe, God loves us with an everlasting love. He has proved Himself faithful to us, despite it is not necessary for Him to be faithful to us who are faithless and who have been heart-breaking to Him. Jesus loves us, Emanuel. That what the Gospel is all about, that is what the Bible is saying, of the God who loves us, who seek us, and who is with us.

In those days, when God gave Adam and Eve freewill, He gave not only their freedom to do good or evil, but also, the choice one could make about his way of looking at things, and to know His love.

Isn't it worth a moment of thoughts about America? The place of origin of Mother's Day and Father's Day. Yet today, 50% of the families are broken. What has happened? And who are we to today's families?

Happy Mother's Day to all. May you have a wonderful time with your family. God bless.

raymond- d'nous student.